Why Being a Mom is Amazing through the Ups and Downs
There’s a lot of negative connotation to being a mom lately—and I don’t think it’s meant to be that way. Social media can’t seem to get the balance right. You’re either seeing picture-perfect Instagram aesthetic moms or the “relatable mom” accounts.
Both of these accounts have their place, but it’s important to realize neither is a fully accurate reflection of motherhood.
It started with the Instagram-aesthetic moms who glamorized motherhood with gleaming white kitchens, clean and organized toy spaces, perfectly behaved kiddos, and more. This started making moms feel less-than and like they were doing something wrong.
So, the opposite started emerging: moms showing their real houses, moms talking about the tough parts of raising a little one, talking about how they get overwhelmed, touched out, and frustrated. Sharing the behaviors of little ones that drive them nuts, etc. It was—and is!— a refreshing change of pace to see the realness behind being a mom.
But the truth, as always, does live somewhere in between the two of these realities. Today, I want to keep it “real” and talk about both sides of things and what I’ve learned through being a mom.
Being a Mom Changes Everything
Some of these changes are scary and hard, but most are wonderful. I am a better person since having my son, hands down. Here are a few of the changes I experienced:
Different priorities: I started thinking about what matters most to me and what I wanted to pass down to my kids. I had to let go of beliefs, societal rules, and expectations from others that I had absorbed over time and go back to what matters to me at my core. I’m still working on this, but it does make you look at the world entirely differently.
Slowing down: I started taking my son’s lead and living more at his pace. It was hard for me at first, and still is. I like to get things done quickly, so I can check it off my list and move on. With a toddler, it doesn’t exactly work like that. But you learn to enjoy the process instead of the outcome, which is such a valuable lesson.
A new type of love: Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I had the emotional capacity to be a mom, but meeting my kid changed everything. Not at first, admittedly. It didn’t happen for me as other moms describe it—an overwhelming love from the moment you first hold them. When I first held my son, honestly, panic went through me. I was like, “Wait, I am in charge of this?” At first, I wondered what in the world I had done. But my love grew and continues to grow every day. It’s a type of love I never thought myself fully capable of.
Being a Mom Inspires Memories
It’s easy to lose sight of things like Santa, Halloween, and celebrating holidays or events when you’re caught up in the day-to-day of being an adult. But when you have a kid, you’re responsible for an entire childhood. No pressure—okay, yeah, maybe a little pressure!
Not only holidays and traditions, but you get to share the things that matter most to you and see their reactions, and their sense of awe at the world. I remember when I was a kid, my parents really valued traveling and seeing the US. We went to 48 states! I want to do the same for my kids, and take the time to document those experiences. It’s not only for them, but it’s for me and my husband as well, and the memories we can create together as a family by taking the time to explore together.
Being a Mom Introduces New Types of Fun
Before I was a mom, my go-to Friday night or weekend activity was going out the bars, staying out late, having a good time! When I became a mom, I quickly realized that was no longer in the cards for a while at least. I was already getting a little old for it anyway—the hangovers get worse as you get older, even if you pace yourself—but when my son came, I wasn’t so interested in leaving all night. And if I did, being hungover with a crying baby or high-energy toddler is not fun at all. Trust me on that one.
So, no more bars for a while, but you’re introduced to another set of fun. You go back to the good ‘ole days of childhood and get to see and experience new things with your kids. There are so many cool things to do around your city with children, like kid museums and discovery centers, zoos, nature centers, and play areas curated just for kids.
I thought they’d be lame, but it’s actually pretty interesting. I’ve learned a lot more by going to these things than I ever did at any bar!
Plus, kids are just entertaining. The things they say seem to come out of left field. They can make you laugh and create so many memories and inside jokes in your family as well. It’s just…well, fun. Even the hard parts can create good memories—like when they throw a tantrum over the wrong colored bowl. It’s not fun in the moment, but I imagine telling them that story later will be fun!
Being a Mom Helps You Grow
I mentioned this earlier, but being a mom completely shifts your priorities. You have to go back to what is really important to you and your family. Sometimes, you find a different purpose in life. Obviously, I wouldn’t have this blog if it wasn’t for becoming a mom. And I love this blog. It gives me such a sense of purpose to share my reflections, thoughts, and research. Even if I don’t get a ton of readers or make a bunch of money off it (er, or any money off of it), it is worth it to me.
Being a mom also humbles you real quick. A lot of the things I’d said earlier that I’d “never do” as a parent are part of my normal routine now LOL. You learn quickly that flexibility and adaptability are key parts of being a mom.
Conclusion
Being a mom is filled with ups and downs. But it’s an experience like no other. It’s important to look at social media accounts and any mom stories as just a snapshot of the entire experience.
Being a mom is hard, that’s for sure, but to me, it’s the most amazing thing I’ve done.