How to Reduce Stress with a Newborn Using a Simple Mindful Feeding Exercise
The newborn phase is magical—or at least, that’s what everyone says. But let’s be real here. It’s also exhausting. It can be both things at once. That’s okay.
You can love your baby and be a good parent even if you hate waking up for the 3 a.m. feeding, feel stuck in a newborn time warp, or barely recognize your life anymore.
These feelings are normal, and they don’t take away from the love you have for your baby.
But talking about stress doesn’t make it disappear. That’s why I want to share a simple way to ease stress and feel more present, even during sleepless nights.
Why Stress Happens in the Newborn Phase
Stress comes with the territory when you have a newborn. I’ll hang my hat on sleep deprivation being the biggest reason, but there’s so much more. Endless feeding sessions, constant pressure to “get it right,” figuring out how to do everything with one hand, getting used to all the newborn quirks—like the way they breathe when they are sleeping—and more.
Every task feels like climbing a mountain and finding “self-care” time is a joke. If anyone else tells you to “sleep when the baby sleeps,” you might scream at them.
So, since I’m with you (I have a six-month-old), I’m going to share an activity I’ve found that takes no extra time. And it can be done while you are doing something you definitely already do: feeding your baby.
Research shows that adding mindfulness to a routine activity can lower stress by up to 27% [1]. That’s a huge deal for new parents.
Mindful Feeding: A Stress-Relief Exercise for New Parents
Breast and/or bottle, it doesn’t matter. You can do this activity anytime you feed your baby. It’s quick, simple, and, like I said, doesn’t require any extra time or tools.
So, even if you aren’t convinced this can actually help you become less stressed with a newborn, there’s truly no harm in trying. Ready? Let’s go!
Step-by-Step Guide to Feeding Your Baby Mindfully
Set the Scene: While feeding your baby, try focusing entirely on that task. Put your phone aside, turn off the TV, and be present in the moment.
Breathe and Center Yourself: Once your baby starts eating (I know it’s tough to try to take a deep breath when your baby is literally screaming for food) take a deep breath. Fill your lungs entirely, hold it at the top, and exhale slowly.
Engage Your Senses: Anchor to the present moment by noticing what’s happening and focusing on it. The warmth of your baby in your arms. The sounds of their breathing, the rhythm of their sucking. What their hands are doing. Notice how you are feeling. Are you tense? Try to relax those muscles in this moment of calm.
Stay Aware of Your Thoughts: It’s easy to let your mind wander to your endless to-do list or what you’d rather be doing. That’s okay. When you catch yourself, bring your mind back to your baby. To this moment. Remind yourself: I’m feeding my baby. That’s all I need to focus on right now.
Stay in This Moment: Feeding your baby is an act of love and care. Appreciate the connection between you and your baby. Appreciate this moment when you’re doing everything you need to be doing—taking care of your baby.
You’re not going to be perfectly mindful the whole time. That’s okay. It takes practice.
What matters most is that you are fully present and living in this single moment, even if it’s only a few minutes.
Why Mindful Feeding Works
When we allow our minds to spiral into worries or future plans, we aren’t truly living—at least, not in the present. Focusing on even just this one activity wholly helps transform an ordinary, dare I say, repetitive and routine moment into a more special moment.
It’s a powerful way to reduce stress and especially helpful when you’re feeling wound tightly.
Encouragement For New Parents
You’re doing great. The newborn phase is incredibly tough. It’s physically and mentally exhausting. It’s okay to feel like you’re barely getting through some days.
Mindfulness isn’t about ignoring the challenges this season of life brings. It’s about acknowledging them without letting them consume you.
It may feel like all you’re doing is holding, feeding, or changing your baby. That’s okay. Using mindfulness as a tool can give you a break from thinking into the future and wondering when the next time you’ll get some good sleep will come.
You’re doing everything you can at this moment. Appreciate the moment, but also appreciate yourself.
References
[1] Kim, J., Kim, JE. & Park, J. Effects of physical cleansing on subsequent unhealthy eating. Mark Lett 29, 165–176 (2018). https://doi.org/10.1007/s11002-018-9458-5
[2] Caetano, B., Chorão, A., Alves, S. et al. Mindfulness-Based Interventions for Parents: A Systematic Review of Target Groups, Effects, and Intervention Features. Mindfulness 15, 2429–2447 (2024). https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-024-02451-1