The Self-Care Industry is Failing Us—Here’s What Real Self-Care Looks Like
Whenever I get online, I’m reminded that I’m failing at self-care. I don’t have time for a 10-step skincare routine, I’m not drinking green smoothies in perfect lighting, I’m not doing yoga at the golden hour, and I’m definitely not visiting luxury wellness retreats.
Does that mean I’m not taking care of myself? The self-care industry would have me believe so.
But the real truth is that self-care has become a multi-billion-dollar industry that profits off our exhaustion and insecurities [1]. I wrote in another blog post that it was a billion-dollar industry, and I completely made that number up. Turns out I was wrong. I was way undershooting it!
The Business of Selling “Wellness”
In 2023, the global wellness economy hit $6.3 trillion—yes, trillion—and it’s only growing [1]. The beauty and personal care market alone was valued at $557 billion and is expected to keep expanding [2]. And yet, despite this explosion of wellness products, services, and influencers telling us how to “do self-care,” most of us are still burnt out, overworked, and feeling like we’re not doing enough.
Why? Because the self-care industry has turned basic human needs into luxury experiences.
Sleep? You’re not doing it right unless you have a $300 weighted blanket and a silk pillowcase.
Hydration? Not without a $40 water bottle that keeps your water at the perfect temperature.
Movement? It’s not enough to stretch or go for a walk—you need a boutique fitness membership and matching workout sets. And those workout leggings that make your butt look just right.
Instead of helping us feel better, the industry makes us feel like self-care is just one more thing we’re failing at.
And trust me… I’ve fallen for all the traps here (minus the leggings…this body is not ready for scrunchie butt leggings and may never be) and I still feel just as miserable. The only difference is that I’m miserable with a $40 water bottle in my hand. Yay!
What Self-Care Actually Looks Like (Hint: It’s Not What They’re Selling You)
Real self-care isn’t something you buy. It’s something you do. And it doesn’t have to take extra time, cost extra money, or feel like another item on your never-ending to-do list.
Here are some ways to integrate self-care into daily life without spending any money:
Physical activity: It doesn’t have to be anything crazy! Just take a walk. Dance to some of your favorite music. Shoot, just wiggle on your way to the kitchen. Do a few squats in your pajamas. Yoga without the mat or any of the other accessories.
Sensory moments: Use some of the lotions you have lying around, but take your time putting them on, smelling them, and enjoying them [3].
Breathing: Literally just breathe. Count it or not. I like taking a deep breath in, holding it for just a beat, and then exhaling really quickly.
Find a hobby or try a hobby you used to love: What used to be your thing when you were younger? Why did you stop? Can you start again? I’m thinking simple things, like making flower crowns from weeds or trying to flip your pencil around your thumb and look cool.
Those are just some ideas I’ve picked up from my studies and all this research. There are so many more. The big thing is to pay attention to what helps you. Not what you think should help you.
You Don’t Need More—You Need Less
If you feel like you’re failing at self-care, it’s probably because you’ve been sold an unrealistic version of it. You don’t need an expensive routine, a picture-perfect moment, or a cart full of wellness products.
You just need to listen to yourself. To take small moments when you can. To let yourself off the hook.
In fact, the most radical form of self-care is knowing that what you’re doing is already enough.
References
[1] https://globalwellnessinstitute.org/press-room/statistics-and-facts/
[2] https://www.grandviewresearch.com/industry-analysis/beauty-personal-care-products-market
[3] Hinz, L.D. (2018). Beyond Self-Care for Helping Professionals: The Expressive Therapies Continuum and the Life Enrichment Model (1st ed.). Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9781315316444